There is something gratifying about going to the gym. There is something about sweating it out, working the muscles, and crunching those abs in the company of total strangers, who are working as hard, or even harder than you. Not to mention that in the presence of ladies, the motivation to exercise even harder is never lacking. There is nothing quite like working the bench press or preacher's curls as you listen to Justin Timberlake or Cassie through your iPod. And you feel good at the end of the session, you come out feeling more like a man, more masculine, more fulfilled, having achieved something at the end of the day.

Isn't that why guys go to the gym, to feel good ? Guys simply just don't go to the gym merely to stay fit. There's this innate need in us to be appreciated, to be praised, and to be admired. We want to be the centre of attraction, or at least close enough to it such that we aren't at the fringes. We want to look good, feel good, dress sharp, and one would be foolish to think all this is done in the name of "self-love". Make no mistake about it, 99% of males go to the gym for one reason - to be more attractive to the opposite sex. The rest are either gay or lying.

I started going to the gym about one-and-a-half months ago. And despite my hectic schedules, I make it a point to go at least once, preferably twice a week. Why? Because I'm obsessed with my masculinity. Since puberty I've been concerned - no distressed - by my straw-thin body. I deplore the fact that I used to skip lunches and dump away my mom's food when she's not looking, causing me to be malnourished, and to lose weight. And as I got older I find that I need to do something about my body. I love standing in front of the mirror in the toilet to admire every line and contour of my body, and flex my biceps to see how much it would bulge. Don't laugh - I know you do it. And there were times where I thought I was Arnold or something, and at other times I felt like Michael Jackson on a diet. But thank God, since I started the habit of going to the gym I felt less like the latter.

Back to the topic of becoming more attractive to the opposite sex, I think it is a point of vulnerability in most guys. Face it, we're always on a lookout for potential mates. We all yearned to be adorned, praised, and admired by people, ESPECIALLY the opposite sex. Suddenly, in the presence of females, especially those we have just gotten to know, we start acting a little bit more chivalrous, we stand a little straighter, talk a little less coarse. Our actions become a little more dignified, and maybe a little more measured. Our fellow BMT-mates simply didn't have that kind of effect on us I'm afraid. Females have the ability to significantly alter the male behaviour with their presence alone.

And it is in this phenomena that something else comes to the fore - the male ego. The male ego is a sensitive thing. And females are the ones that wield the greatest weapon ever known to mankind against the male sex. Their words and actions can either destroy or affirm the male ego. Men have an innate desire to protect and to serve, to be leaders and initiators. They consider it their calling to be providers of the family, to be a voice to the weak, who can stand strong in times of need. And when that ability is threatened, or perceived to be endangered, the male ego suffers. The male ego is a shrine, an altar of worship, highly esteemed and revered. It is to be treated with care.

I don't know about other guys, but as for me, I'm extremely distressed when females ignore me, or do not shower me with enough attention that I deem myself deserving of. I hate it when girls snub me for reasons which I really don't have the slightest idea to. I've had it happened to me a couple of times in my life. Like when I was in JC, I used to be good friends with this girl. We would talk and share about a lot of things, and sometimes she would call me to ask for advice on stuff. Wow, I mean, how gratifying is that! But gradually as time wore on our friendship grew apart, a line was drawn and she distanced herself from me. She never told me why, and though I have an inkling of it, I guess I would never know for sure.

And there's this guy who used to like that same girl. And he poured out his affections online in his blog, and even included a photo of her (disastrous!) for good measure. He thought nobody would know. And guess what? A friend of her chanced upon his blog, and told her about it, and she did the thing that hurts guys the most - she avoided him! Oh and you could imagine the torment that was wrought upon him. He felt really miserable, down to the pits, and I'm not sure if he's recovered from it.

Such things hurt guys really bad. I was thinking: maybe I'm just not good enough at gettin 'em, their attention I mean. And there are guys who have been bruised but they learn from it, understand a little more about the mysteries of the female sex, and move on from there. I've certainly learnt a lot out of those misadventures of mine. But there are those who fall and never climb up again.

So ladies, next time when you encounter a guy, mind the male ego!