After a brief hiatus due to exams, I made an eager return to my favourite (actually the only) online pseudo Worms action game- Gunbound. Spotting a game room designated for Singaporeans, I entered and started chatting with the other players. I quickly discovered myself to be in the company of an entirely different age group. Being 10 years older than the next eldest player, my attempts to disguise myself as a kid to mix in with the crowd only resulted in me feeling like a dinosaur.

Talk about a generation gap!

It's Generation X meets MTV Generation. Having turned 23 this year, it's kind of hard to re-establish myself as a kid (but still getting my IC checked when buying beer or watching NC-16 flicks certainly helps put things in perspective). The resulting conversation drove me mad enough to (horror of horrors) want to hit somebody over the head with a soft-cover book.

On a side note, you can never be sure if somebody is telling the truth on the Internet. Well here's a simple checklist to confirm if you're really talking to a kid: if he think that the Harry Potter series are works of classic; if he mangles the English language by using abbreviations excessively or inappropriately; or if he owns a pair of roller shoes, then (in my definition at least), he's definitely a kid. Anyway so this annoying tyke was going somewhere along the lines of "OMG UR SUCH A FAG! lolx!!! ChEk OuT Mi KoOl RoLlEr ShOeZ." It took me a while to figure out what he was trying to say and how playing the game has anything to do with my sexual orientation. Feeling somewhat insulted, I challenged them to a match and promptly had my behind handed to me on a (virtual) silver platter. Not to be slighted, I attempted to debate the youngsters on the societal implications of Nietzschean individualism but was promptly kicked out by the server for my efforts.

MTV Generation: 1 Generation X: 0

Seriously though, I believe I understand the reason for kids turning out this way. Life's a bed of roses if you're part of the MTV Generation. You needn't bother to comprehend difficult vocabulary like "wardrobe malfunction" and "unilateralism" or be familiar with the names of exotic locations like Abu Ghraib and Chechen. The wife certainly won't catch you lads with naughty photos in your computer, since you're not likely to be married at such a young age. Wait, on second thoughts, I take that back. Also, there's no need to ponder over deep philosophical issues like whether Iraq War II should carry on raging because a bad man named Saddam (or Bush if you're on the other side of the world) has big bad Weapons of Mass Destruction or not, no need to bother with keeping track of the political turmoil in India and Taiwan and certainly no need to worry about where your next meal is coming from. Unless you need to skip meals to afford that latest model of handphone or Britney Spears' album, that is. These issues don't concern you in the slightest.

The only downside to being a kid in these times would have to be what passes off as entertainment- seeing all those people suffering on the TV reality shows. That really breaks my heart. Really, even though we're not half as good looking, talented or even desperate as them, they deserve our fullest sympathy for bravely subjecting themselves to abuse and ridicule just for that chance to fulfill their dreams. And those dreams usually involve obscene amounts of cash and/or fame. And how can we forget the various juicy celebrity sex scandals? Juveniles are wisely permitted by the censors to watch them while at the same time protected from viewing all those horrible movies where people do all kinds of nasty things like taking off their clothes. Those kinds of things just don't happen in real life! Besides, if life gets too rough (for example your mum confiscates your X-Box) for you, then release via a jump from the nearest 16th storey rooftop is but a stone's throw away. If all else fails, simply locate the nearest infrastructure built by dubious contractors and wait for the inevitable collapse. Or pop a few slimming pills.

Oh and on the off chance that you actually are one of the aforementioned kids and feel somewhat insulted, guess what? You're right.

MTV Generation: 1 Generation X: 1